Wednesday, May 6, 2009

A new adventure awaits

I really don't know what to make of my current state. Am I excited? Am I scared? Am I worried? Am I happy? Am I ready? Am I not?

The fact is, I do feel like a ball of raw nerves, undecided, unsure yet somehow an inkling at the back of my mind tells me it's all going to be fine. In fact, better than fine.

This is HUGE man (definitely not referring to the rapid expansion of my mid-section, of which I constantly think of it as the "meat" section too). First, I decided to get hitched and have all preparations insanely pulled together within 7 months (which really is 7 weeks in fact). Then comes this miraculous little blob of life who had continued to fixate itself onto my uterus wall, despite 9 full weeks of very, VERY un-mother-like behaviour of it's carrier (yours truly).

I have since then given up all my favourite vices (I will miss my cigarettes and beer... but I am sure they can wait), because it is the right thing to do.

My body isn't just mine alone anymore (for the next couple of months at least), because what I do, has a direct effect on another's life. It will be wrong of me to continue smoking and drinking because of my own whimps and let my child live with my mistake for life. It is just not fair. I wouldn't want my mom to do that to me, neither should I do that to my child.

So as the days and week progresses, my daily cocktail includes insane amount of frolic acid, DHA etc, in a cocktail of pills, milk formula and supposed "balanced" diet.

I really don't mind the vanishing waistline nor the uncontrollable hunger pangs, but I really wished constipation wasn't such a bitch. Well, who said pregnancy's a smooth ride anyway. And I already have it good, cos constipation is apparently my only problem.

Unexpected and unplanned as it might be, I believe that this little addition to our family couldn't have chosen a better time to come into our lives.

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